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Однако Тесла отлично   
09:33am 01/02/2014
  Основываясь на работе с лучистой энергией, рентгеновскими лучами и лампами Ленарда, ученый создал прибор, способный, кроме прочего, улавливать так называемые космические лучи.
Наиболее ошеломляющим было заявление о том, что Джон Шэд, недавно оставивший пост председателя КЦББ, станет председателем правления Drexel.
Он зачесывал волосы назад и, тщательно следя за своим гардеробом, носил костюмы только от лучших портных.
JVTZBVTJPAWHSQWMZMDJDWYKISUSXBPHLRJZEFAKEOEMCYADNZVDYCWPOMSRRTTMSERGHAKLYYMFIASGAUZGJGSCWNJAVZEDYWMR
 
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Над ним насмехались   
02:46am 01/02/2014
  У одной тетушки, Вевы, вспоминал Тесла, «было два выступающих клыка, похожих на бивни слона.
Мимо гроба тянулась длинная процессия.
Посселл не только предвидит день, когда насос можно будет использовать внутри человеческого организма, например в качестве сердечного клапана, но и когда турбина будет доведена до совершенства.
YTRKMRKQVEPFNDRPZNVRUEHPPUAGWPKUZNYOLQFBQSXNHBNNZCWVJYQVEMAYFODMHTXTWPDUCYIOKRURJTJGJIYFXELSYDVJUVUA
 
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Ливайн тут же   
12:42am 01/02/2014
  Вместе они запустили одну из незабываемых катушек Тесла в классическом фильме Бориса Карлоффа «Франкенштейн».
Молташ, которого обвинители не зря считали одним из самых нестойких людей в окружении Милкена, уже колебался.
Незадолго до этого Карберри обратил внимание на то обстоятельство, что годовой бюджет КЦББ составляет 105 млн.
IWGTOBSDCRYSOGKYTSLPIEENTEPTGWEVANWIVEIJAPWMGKXPIXDFWAITQOAEZSYVKBKCJBBIGRRICAPVLGUTJBOZNYDXFPOBZSVU
 
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Сам же Милкен   
11:45pm 31/01/2014
  Когда его обвинили в том, что он уклоняется от выполнения общественного долга, Морган в ярости ответил: «Я ничего не должен обществу».
Более подробно рассуждать об этом открытии сложно, поскольку очевидно, что Тесла фактически приравнивал создание трубы для производства радия к появлению «межпланетного коммутатора».
Он сидел в его центре, а по диагоналям от него, вдоль четырех ответвлений X, удобно располагались его заместители, число которых постоянно росло.
SKABCNVHRJPPOPJUUWVGROSJJPUUVADJXINXHNFGOAEMSEZZOEUGCDOUTJLPHWKHDIBXEIIVSCUALUOGWVWBQSZQOKEUEFOAUUGT
 
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Аккерман сообщил Джозефу   
07:23pm 30/01/2014
  По зрелом размышлении они, однако, поняли, что та Kidder, Peabody, которую они знали и любили, умерла гораздо раньше.
На ней присутствовали Робинсон, Лерер и ряд других руководителей Robinson, Lake, а также Лаймен, Флюменбаум, Сэндлер и сам Милкен.
Он рассказал Фримену о деталях плана защиты SCA и сказал, что антитрестовская защита является по большей части уловкой ради повышения цены предложения о поглощении.
WLZXQQEMZCQWQZVQASLTCIVNYETZBNUDNZQDCSHIAUVBUDLITUMSCBEJVXDVZERAUQMNRGRIPDQMLCKXFMYEERUMYOKVDZJTASPB
 
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Всем стало ясно   
06:01pm 30/01/2014
  Тесла пришел к выводу, что его успех зависит от того, удастся ли ему изменить мнение одногоединственного человека.
Брауну – известному инженеру, работавшему на «Вестерн Юнион Телеграф Компани».
Свою задачу Ливайн видел в поддержании постоянного контакта с арбитражерами и отслеживании любых изменений текущей ситуации, способных повлиять на план.
NUJCROZBPLGOAKWACYVFPAOONEPURTALOVKAMDTHORSNXSMLPEOFRXSRWFZVJKOXTOEELTTNUFABPHDKIGHIVHBGXAGFYSZCERFF
 
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Ok, I have to post it too, because it rocks just that much.   
10:49pm 21/08/2006
 
mood: impressed
We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
 
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Quote of the Day:   
11:36pm 10/06/2006
 
mood: indeterminate and inconclusive
"It's just things start happening, you go down a road and you think it's just for a little while. And you get caught up in it, and you get kind of into it, don't even have time to really ask questions about it; before you know it, you're living a life that you didn't set out to or intended to. You know what I mean?"

- John Beckwith The Wedding Crashers

I wish I really knew what it is I want and what I'm going to get. I wish I could see the future. See how things turn out. Am I going to make it to Italy, am I going to find someone to love me unconditionally and unrelentingly, continually seeking to know me, am I going to get my M.A., am I going to be able to look back at my life and say it was all worth it?

Sometimes I find myself thinking about all my friends and their relationships. What would I do if I got in a serious relationship? How would I handle that? Would I sabotage it and run? Would I go with it? Would I second guess myself into ruining it? In some ways these questions cause a sort of apprehension about relationships. Call it a "fear of committment"; call it a "defense mechanism"; "self-protection strategy"; whatever. I"m really awfully, terribly, ridiculously afraid of making a mistake and having to look back with regret. So much so that I run away from things and end up regretting it. It's a total catch-22. It all just basically boils down to the fact that I feel really lost in my life. I see my friends with their relationships and careers and accomplishments as being these really great things. And I want to do something great with my life too. I don't feel like I'm doing anything great with my life. I feel like I'm stagnant. There's absolutely NO adventure. There's no passion. There's no colour. And I feel like this is constantly at the back of my mind, like a subconcious obsession.

The thing is I had a great day today. I went garage sailing, played the usual role of 3rd wheel at lunch with Will & his girflriend Becca, came back home and stained my bookshelf, went to the gym, came home watched some crime drama, and cooked some microwave pasta-express. (ok, so the day was great except for the microwaved pasta-express, yuck - lesson learned) Anyways, as great as the day was, it was one of those days that begs company. Not just any company mind you, but the company of someone who loves you and whom you love, a best friend, a companion, someone to share laughs with etc., etc..

I was standing out on my balcony last night admiring the stars, (what a disney moment right?), and I was thinking. If the right thing came along, would I be prepared to get married? I honestly don't know. Part of me says that I feel no where NEAR mature or old enough to make that sort of life-decision. But really people my age ARE making that sort of decision. In fact MOST of them are. Which leaves me somewhat in the IMmature category when one comes to think about it. Am I missing something? Did I not get the everyone-should-be-married-by-25 memo? And so there's this other part of me that says that when/if that right person comes along, there'll be some sort of watershed epiphanic event in my psyche that will allow me to make that step. As I said, I'd just like to have some sort of crystal ball to be able to look and see what the future holds. Of course, if I keep along this current trend, I certainly won't have to worry about marraige.

Hell, I could die tomorrow, and it'd all be a moot point.
 
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The State of things   
12:13am 06/06/2006
 
mood: complacent
Ah, I do love summer holidays.

Today I joined a gym for the first time in my life. I'm hoping that the fact that I'm paying big bucks will force me to get in there and get my fat ass back in shape. Anyways, that's just one of my summer goals. Here are the rest:

Read the books on my summer reading list.
Do some building in the woodshop (partly already done, I built a bookshelf/table which is freakin sweet and just awaiting a delicious mahogany stain)
Chill in Austin with Annekin
Chill in San Antonio
Grad school summer 1
Take ballroom Dance lessons in my neverending quest to be the superpimpdizzle
Research Assistanceship
Organize the crap under my bed (christmas decorations, electronic accessories, winter clothes, random computer parts)

Happy List
Thank God this year I don't have the GRE hanging over my head.
My Grill
My Bookshelf/table
This grad course is only ten classes long
Sherlock Holmes
Garage Sailing (My newly rediscovered weekend passion)
Sitting around making puzzles
Chipotle
Free Food
Joe
My Apartment
The word "rubbish." what a fun word to use.
My new apartment friends downstairs, Scarlet and Norm
Sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.


Pissy List
Texas Heat
Having almost spent myself into the red this pay period with 8 more days to go
Gas Prices Fucking President asshole wanker
Not being able to get a dog
Not having many friends my age to call up and chill with on a whim.
loneliness
Not being able to play my drums
Wanting some, and not getting any
Forgetting to take the rubbish out to the curb today
 
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So say you'll come and set me free...   
11:31pm 11/05/2006
 
mood: Open
Steal my heart
and hold my tongue
I feel my time,
my time has come...

Let me in,
unlock the door.
I've never felt this way before...

The wheels just keep on turning,
The drummer begins to drum
I don't know which way I'm going
I don't know which way I've come...

Hold my head,
Inside your hands.
I need someone who understands.
I need someone, someone who heals..
For you I've waited all these years.

In your tears,
and in your blood,
In your fire,
and in your flood.
I hear you laugh.
I heard you sing.
I wouldn't change a single thing...

For you I'd wait till Kingdome COme
Until my day, my day is done.
Just say you'll come
and set me free
Just say you'll wait,
you'll wait for me.
 
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Scary Thought   
06:10pm 23/04/2006
  sometimes I worry that the best years of my life will not one day be worth looking back upon.  
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Quote of the day:   
11:19pm 09/04/2006
 
mood: Fatalistic
I'll live my life waiting myself to death.


I took a walk today into the mysterious little path across the street from my apartment that leads deep into the forest. It's neat how you can actually escape the sounds of the highway in the dense thicket of trees and the lush green carpet like grass that has overgrown a good portion of the path as you get deeper in. I came to a deep ravine which was to be traversed by a single pipe across it leading to town lake. After crossing, I walked around the lake watching the normal people my age playing volleyball, having barbecues, and sitting with their sweethearts whispering sweet nothings in the shade of a willow tree on an early spring day tinged with a hint of winter breeze.

And as I walked, I wished to be living another life, a life with meaning, a life with passion, a life with purpose, a life with adventure, a life with companionship and intimacy, a life that justifies me as a significant person, a life that's worth living.
 
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Songs ripped from the pages of my life.   
11:27pm 18/03/2006
 
mood: disappointed
Its not like I haven't tried and tried
It isn't where I look but what I find
Been keeping clear of stepping on the cracks
This just enough to keep my coming back

Oh I'm waiting for better angels
Oh I'm waiting for any lead
Though my case looks fatal
I'm still hoping better angels come to me

Better late than not at all
Better to make a break than take a fall
I wouldn't mind hanging on
If I could find out what I'm hanging from

Taking hold, breaking in
The pressures on, need to circulate
Mesmerize and taken in
Moving slow, so it resonates
It's time to rest, not to sleep away
My thoughts alone, try to complicate
I'll do my best, to seek you out
And be myself, not impersonate

Tried so hard to not walk away
And when things didn't go my way
I'll still carry on and on just the same

I've always been strong
But can't make this happen
'Cause I need to breathe, I want to breathe you in
The fear of becoming
so tired of running
And I need to breathe, I want to breath you in
I want to breathe you in

that I would be good even if I did nothing
that I would be good even if I got the thumbs down
that I would be good if I got and stayed sick
that I would be good even if I gained ten pounds

that I would be fine even if I went bankrupt
that I would be good if I lost my hair and my youth
that I would be great if I was no longer king
that I would be grand if I was not all knowing

that I would be loved even when I numb myself
that I would be good even when I am overwhelmed
that I would be loved even when I was fuming
that I would be good even if I was clingy

that I would be good even if I lost sanity
that I would be good
whether with or without you
 
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That's Hot... (My Type)   
07:12pm 13/03/2006
 
mood: curious
1. A whiz in the kitchen & LOVES to watch me eat

2. Doesn't NEED makeup to look beautiful. A woman who can command the attention of a room by her confident presence not by being half naked. A radiant smile is a must.

3. Doesn't Smoke

4. Is polite, feminine, classy, and the "quiet type" (i.e. not in people's faces all the time)

5. Brunette (though that's not a hard and fast requisite)I kinda have a thing for cute nerds (think rectangular thick dark rim glasses, flowy brown hair, come hither brown eyes, kissable lips, olive skin, and a to-die-for smile. Mmmmm)

6. Intelligent, Thoughtful, Refelctive, and Insightful- Wise beyond her years; Has things to teach me
(if in our first IM conversation she uses things like "ur" for you are or your, or "Im" for I am, or a bunch of misspelled words, it probably ain't gonna happen) Oh, and God help you if you spell all your plural nouns with a z (e.g. girlz, boyz, etc.) (And she shouldn't curse like a sailor either; That's a big turn-off)

7. Romantic and she appreciates it when I make an effort to be romantic

8. NOT a party girl whose sole concern is going out, dancing, and being stupid drunk all the time. She can have a good time is sitting around playing on the internet or reading together.

9. Petite and probably under 5'5"& Preferably no more than 3 years younger or older than me

10. Gracious & Modest, but brags about me to her friends

11. Interested in Travel & learning new things/ways

12. Any foreign accent can be a plus

13. Geographically Desirable

14. Able to keep me interested (read hard to get, yet attainable),

15. Comfortable in her own skin and physically active (read: Keeps herself AND ME in good shape)

16. Funny - In the sense that she sees the humor in everyday things/occurences, Understands my odd sense of humor

17. Patient, Empathetic, and Forgiving; always remembers the good over the bad. She will also not try to force me to talk about things when I'm not comfortable talking about them.

18. A good listener as well as an expressive speaker

19. Cosmopolitan, Cultured, and Eclectic with Diverse Interests & tastes

20. Organized & Neat

21. Creative & Spontaneous

22. Passionate & Compassionate

23. Faithful, Truthful, & Honest no matter what

24. Loves to Laugh

25. Family & Faith Oriented

26. Loves to people watch

27. Her idea of a perfect saturday night is cold and rainy outside by the fire under a blanket with a cup of hot chocolate & a dvd.

28. Likes the following types of music rock, jazz, and classical and at least open to everything else in between.

29. RICH AS HELL! (*Just Kidding)


If I think of anything else, I'll add it.


Does this girl exist?
 
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Quote of the day:   
09:04pm 19/02/2006
 
mood: amused
[20:40] CrashKiran: dude, i am ALREADY walking a fine line of desperate and pathetic
[20:40] CrashKiran: hurry dating?
[20:40] CrashKiran: c'mon
[20:40] demurefemme: dude, lots of people go out like that
[20:40] CrashKiran: that's diving RIGHT IN!
 
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Hey... I know what'll cheer you up...   
08:42pm 19/02/2006
 
mood: complacent
It's Peanut Butter Jelly Time, Peanut Butter Jelly Time, Peanut Butter Jelly Time, Wheyyat? Wheyyat? Wheyyat? Now Theyyygo Theyyygo. Peanut Butter Jelly, Peanut Butter Jelly. Do the Peanutbutterjelly, peanutbutterjelly, peanutbutterjelly with a basebalbat. ..
 
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Singlehood Awareness Day - I.E. Don't Read This Entry   
10:22pm 13/02/2006
 
mood: lonely
Well, here it is once again. Another lonely Valentines day... or as I have aptly referred to it: Singlehood Awareness Day. Truly, one never feels more single than on this day. Coincidently and just as perfect fate might have planned it. Today is exactly one year since I last went on a date. Sure, I might be inclined to delude myself with the old Broken Road theory; that God is granting me a series of foundational learning experiences on which to base my future happiness, but I'm not really optimistic enough to go for that.

John Mayer says, "he's out there; she's out there, and they're just learning what to contrast you against." Well that's nice and idealistic, but what if they're not? I have several friends who are in their late forties who haven't found that love Santa come down their chimneys. Maybe it (love) like Valentines day is a gigantic farce that we as a collectively believe is our inherent due. Maybe some people just don't get it in their lives. I know I certainly haven't done anything worth deserving love. I haven't done anything so wonderful with my life to justify it. On the whole, I think I have led a pretty mediocre and meaningless existence. Maybe there are just some people who are never able to prove themselves worthy in God's eyes.

Tammy says I've got to do the old wink-n-smile technique. I've tried this, and I've come to one empirical conclusion. I am invisible to girls my age. Now, the under 14 crowd loves me, and so does the over 35 crowd. I'm a huge hit with them. However, to the girls whom I see each day out and about, I'm as transparent as glass. It's like my pappy used to say: "water, water everywhere..."

Pretty much almost everyone I know is in these serious meaningful long-term-on-the-fast-track-to-marriage relationships (if not marriage), and I'm sitting here on friday/saturday nights in my apartment, twiddling my thumbs and watching CSI reruns trying to fill the emptiness with grilled foods and ice cream. (mmmmmm.... delicious)
So I try an tell myself to get used to it; because the more you try to look for love, the less you find it. Just accept what you can not change. I hate that I complain about being single, and I sound like a broken record to myself; I can only imagine how tired my friends are of hearing it. So I've worked at, and gotten better at not talking about it as much. Nobody wants rain on a parade. And yeah, I'm writing about it here, and 90% of my journal entries for the past god-knows-how-long have rotated around a central theme, but nobody has to listen; in fact I'm sure nobody really does anyways. So it's a non targeted/non-abrasive outlet for my frustrations and insecurities that no one HAS to listen to or read. Lord knows, I honestly don't want to be "That guy."

I look around at all these people my age and I think WTF is wrong with me that freakin everyone in my age bracket is in relationships and I haven't been on a date in a year?John is engaged and getting married in the summer, the only two single girls my age at Wester both got engaged within a week of each other in December, Anne and Matt are living together now, Will and his gf have been together for over a year, Jimmy and his gf have been together over a year, Ian and Julia are of course celebrating their one year wedding anniversary, Jessica has more dates this week than I have in the past 16 months, not to mention every single time I hear about so and so's cute friend or relative that they "thought about" hooking me up with, I always hear the old "yeah, but she's got a boyfriend." I have tried to refine myself and make myself into a better person, the kind of person I want to be. And quite honestly, I think I'm pretty happy with myself. I have wiped the blemishes of the shitty house, the shitty car, the shitty financial situation, even the shitty academic performance to at least bring myself to relatively self-respecting standards. But it seems like I'm still not the calibre person who attracts members of the opposite sex. I know that I'm not the richest guy with the most to offer, or the smartest guy with the most potential, or the best looking guy with the best show-ability, but I just wonder to myself what can I do to make myself desireable to people whom I want to attract and not perpetually invisible. It's not like I'm asking for marriage, I just want some affirmation in the form of a pretty, sane, intelligent young lady going on a date with me if I ask her out instead of blurting an indifferent "maybe" and walking off. Every day in the lunch room, I hear one of two conversations: the conversation about the spouse/kids or the conversation about being single.(From the 50 yr. old thrice divorced lunchmate). I know I am highly "obsessed with being single" as Julie put it, but you know being in that environment all day every day can really bring it out and make one self-conscious about it!

In the end, I know I'll be attending the same party I was at this time last year: the pity party. Ha ha. And yes, I do hate that about myself, But really, we destined-to-be-single people have to embrace what we've got. We've got ourselves. We're really the only people we have there for us to understand; because once you're in a relationship you forget what it was really like. I'm always here for me when I need an ice cream bucket to cry into...

In short , Singlehood Awareness day is just S.A.D.

I promise, I'll talk about something else next time...
 
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Some things change, some things stay the same   
01:10am 29/12/2005
 
mood: blah
You know it really is funny how they say that once you leave, you can never go home again. Funnily, I'm in the house where I grew up, but I don't feel at home. I don't really think I have a "home" anymore. I have a place where I live, and that feels more like home than anything else. Oh well, I guess I'll call that home...

Well, I'm heading home tomorrow

Why no one will help me
I am too dumb I am too smart
They'll not understand me
I am lonely
They'll hate me
And there is not enough time
It's too hard to help me
And god wants me to work
No resting no lazy
I'm too far from home
It takes far too much energy
And I cannot afford to
No one will ever see me
No one can have it all see
I have to they want me to
And I can't let them down
I'll never be happy

These excuses how they served me so well
They've kept me safe
They've kept me stuck
They've kept me locked in my own cell
 
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Thoughts on the occasion   
10:10pm 10/11/2005
 
mood: contemplative
Amazing still it seems.

I'll be 23.

I won't always love what I'll never have.

I won't always live in my regrets.
 
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In case you're interested,   
06:11pm 05/11/2005
 
mood: Blessed
Ok, I must preface by saying that I normally feel it quite presumptuous to give people a list of things that you want them to get you. I, of course, do not expect anything. But my friend brought up a good point, people are going to get you something whether you tell them what you want or not, and they want to get you something you want, so you might as well let them know what it is you want. So here's my Wish list. I think that the semantics of the phrasing "wish list" are much less assuming. I feel very blessed to have people actually care enough to ask, so thanks in advance!


Kiran’s 2005 Wish List

1. Gift Certificates:

Ross
Ikea
Target
Home Depot
WalMart
Half Price Books
Garden Ridge
Fry’s Electronics
Famous Footwear
Some place that frames diplomas
Gap
Old Navy
Amazon.com
Kohls

2. Music/ DVD Movies

Jimmy Eat World – Futures
A Perfect Circle – The Thirteenth Step
Keith Urban – Be Here
Edith Piaf – Le Vie En Rose
James Bond DVD Box Set Volume 2


3. Tools:

Dremmel Set

4. Etc:

Coffee Grinder
Remy Martin VSOP Cognac
10GB IPOD
 
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